The (Mis)Education of Sex: Why Abstinence-Only Education is Hurting Our Children

As sex is becoming increasingly prevalent in today’s society, is teaching abstinence really the best way to protect our children?

Illustration by Katie Carey

By Michelle Pantoja

March 4, 2019

With only 22 states in our nation teaching any type of sex education, it’s not a coincidence that the United States has the highest rate of teen pregnancies in the world, with the highest rates of sexually-transmitted diseases, too. However, it isn’t this generation’s addiction to social media that’s causing this.

To get to the bottom of this, we must start at the place where kids are the most influenced— their schools. As kids, we’re constantly encouraged to ask questions during lectures to further our comprehension and make sure we’re understanding the material. And as our bodies begin to change and develop, more questions pop up in our heads. But what happens when the curriculum being taught is too straightforward and isn’t welcoming any questions?

What is Abstinence-Only Education?

Abstinence-only education (AOE) is curricula that teaches to avoid having sex until marriage. It portrays the benefits of waiting to have sex, with little to no extra information about sex like contraceptives and sexually-transmitted diseases. While this form of teaching may seem the safest since abstinence as a success rate of 100% for prevention of unplanned pregnancies and sexually-transmitted diseases, we’re harming our children by withholding other crucial information about sex. Studies show that among 18- and 19-year-olds, 41 percent know little or nothing about condoms, and 45 percent say they know nothing about contraception (Bell). As an older sister (and practically second mom), I understand the fear of exposing our children to sensitive topics such as sex at such a young age. However, it is more frightening to know that our kids are going out into the world with such little knowledge of a subject that is innate to us as humans and are unable to protect themselves. Not only are we harming our youth, but we are consequently harming our nation’s health and economy through the implementation of AOE.

Beyond Talking About Sex

Comprehensive sexual education provides more benefits than just knowing about safe sex. Additionally, this sex curriculum does not introduce 11-year-olds to graphic and explicit images of sex, a common and valid fear of parents. Informational lesson plans included in these curricula will begin to teach students about relationships, their feelings, and boundaries at a young age. Examples of this curriculum include asking students what they feel when they think about someone they like (parents, friends, siblings) to get students to comprehensively and independently analyze their feelings and emotions. Young students are then taught about the importance of consent and boundaries by asking if certain actions, like random bear hugs from fellow classmates, make them uncomfortable or not. This prepares students to comprehend their actions and feelings in order to make more conscious choices to keep themselves and those around them comfortable. This later translates into healthier future relationships, whether intimate or not, and creates more intelligent and aware students. Through a more comprehensive sex education, we teach our kids something even more valuable—emotional intelligence, something that is difficult to teach and not commonly discussed. However, learning to how understand emotions and communicate with others is essential to a healthy life and is even highly valued now in the workplace and in relationships.

This type of education has been famously implemented in the Netherlands and has proven fantastic results. According to PBS, “The Netherlands boasts some of the best outcomes when it comes to teen sexual health. On average, teens in the Netherlands do not have sex at an earlier age than those in other European countries or in the United States (de Melker).” This is another common yet understandable fear of parents when it comes to sex-ed. If students are exposed to the topic of sex at a young age, they will be more inclined to have sexual intercourse at a younger age. However, the Netherland’s successful curricula has proven this fear wrong and put many Dutch parents at ease.

Studies also found that among 12 to 25-year-old people in the Netherlands, most say they had “wanted and fun” first sexual experiences. This is where the importance of building healthy relationships comes into play. After learning how to navigate their feelings and have respectful relationships, kids and teenagers do not rush into sex just to do it. They wait until they feel ready and comfortable enough to have sexual intercourse because they have learned the value of their feelings and know the importance of recognizing feelings of discomfort.

By comparison, 66% of sexually active American teens surveyed said they wished that they had waited longer to have sex for the first time (de Melker). These regrets are a result of teenagers rushing into sexual experiences, without having the knowledge beforehand of what they are getting themselves into. Our students do not currently have the emotional intelligence to process their feelings and thoughts to make decisions that work best for them. Because abstinence-only education portrays as a big, bad, scary monster that children should avoid, rebellious teenagers are even more inclined to rush into their sexual experiences out of curiosity, since they are not fully informed of what sex even is.

Making America Healthy Again

While AOE teaches that abstinence has a 100% success rate to prevent unplanned pregnancies and STDs, it fails to mention that condoms have a 97% of preventing the same risks. Teaching a comprehensive, inclusive, and fact-based sex education (if any at all) in schools is our first step to keeping our kids safe. To reiterate this shocking, yet important fact, the U.S. has the highest rates of sexually transmitted diseases and the highest rate of teenage pregnancies among all industrialized countries (Bell). While most countries in European Union mandate schools to teach some sort of sex education, only 27 states of our nation require sex ed to be taught in schools. In fact, 22 of these 27 states strictly teach only teach abstinence and are consequently the states with the highest rates of STDs. Our students are calling for help and we must work together to ensure their well-being.

A comprehensive sex education includes teaching students about all of their options, not just abstinence. Courses include lessons on different STDs and STIs and the symptoms of each one (not to scare students necessarily but help them catch early symptoms and receive treatment), a variety of contraceptives, and the values of consent in relationships, intimate or not. Students also learn how to put on a condom safely, if needed, without making any dangerous tears or rips. By teaching them the risks of sex, but also pairing each lesson with preventative measures and resources to use, we are equipping our students with important tools to navigate their personal lives. Without this information our kids will continue to be uninformed and continue spreading preventative diseases. We cannot let our nation be internationally recognized as the “Home of the Brave, Land of the STDs and STIs.”

Additionally, informing students allows them to make their own knowledgeable decisions without rushing into anything unwanted simply because adults always told them “no.” We can all agree that as teenagers, we hated being restricted by our parents’ rules, and did everything possible to break them. By allowing students to take the responsibility into their hands, they become more mature, knowledgeable adults and make their own smart choices. Studies have shown that students that have had a comprehensive sex education were more assertive and better communicators. Not only does a more thorough education make our youth more informed, but it creates a stronger and more mature generation of young adults that will soon be the face of our nation.

The Dangers of Only Teaching Abstinence

Abstinence-only education assumes that all students are going to carefully follow these instructions and does not account for personal choices or accidents. Humans are not perfect by default, whether we are 15 years old, or 42. Not every teenager will wait until marriage to have sexual encounters, so we must prepare our students in case they decide to make these decisions, so they can at least be safe about it.

How Comprehensive Sex-Ed can save our economy

Every year, the cost of living continues to soar every year as new tax policies continue to be put in place, putting the majority of Americans at a disadvantage. As we work together to keep our economy sustainable and efficient, we must look to new ways of saving money and directing money more efficiently.

Comprehensive sex-ed gives us the power to significantly reduce the number of unplanned pregnancies. By informing students of a multitude of preventative measures they can take to have safe sex, it is increasingly likely that teen pregnancies will not be as prevalent as they currently are. As a result of informative presentations and curricula, the number of teen parents relying on government benefits like WIC will significantly reduce. Not only does comprehensive teaching allow teenagers to continue growing and experience being students, but it saves the nation money by reducing the number of welfare recipients. Programs like WIC are funded by our tax money, funding $6 billion a year. The cost of raising a child in the United States costs $233,610 and most of this money will likely have to be paid for by federal funding, as teen student-parents cannot raise a child on a minimum-wage job.

Unplanned pregnancies are not the only outcome of unsafe sex that we have to financially account for. As stated previously, the United States has the highest rates of individuals with STDs and STIs in the developed world. These easily preventative health issues are hurting our youth and our pockets. According to Bass, the estimated cost to the US health care system from new infections is $16 billion annually, including HIV and HPV diagnoses. Among the non-viral STDs, chlamydia is the most common and costly infection, estimated at almost $517 million in annual health care costs (Bass). With the implementation of a more informative, representative sexual curriculum, these rates will significantly decrease and allow us to save some money during tax season.

Making the change to a new sex education isn’t as painful as you would think, either. The typical cost for a school-based sex education curriculum is roughly $200 (Bass). In 2015, there were approximately 24,000 US public secondary schools. If each of these schools implemented a sex education curriculum, it would cost around $4.8 million annually to educate teens about sex. Given the $43 million in annual STD savings, clearly the benefits of implementing sex education outweigh the costs.

Our tax money will not solely fund welfare benefits and will instead fund more education initiatives that will make our children smarter, stronger, and healthier. As responsible citizens of this nation, our children will help save us money. In short, it is clear to see that there are many benefits for all Americans by implementing a comprehensive, fact-based, sex education in public K-12 schools. So how do we make this change now?

What can we do now?

During a critical time in this era, we must be practical and make choices that benefit the nation as a whole. We have tried strictly teaching abstinence to students in health classes. We have made attempts to warn our children of the risks of sexual activities. We have shielded them for years. But these tactics have proved unsuccessful. Now, we must switch tactics and inform our students of their options—preventative care, informative resources, and responsible relationships. By giving our students the freedom to grow into adults and understand their options, we are able to keep them safer.

Decisions about what type of education our students receive are ultimately in the hands of our state officials, but we have the power to call out these people in power that represent us and demand change. Now more than ever, it necessary to speak out for the well-being of our children. If your child, grandchild, neighbor, whoever, goes to a school where sex education is not even taught, call your state representative. We must first ensure that all states in the nation mandate their public schools to teach sex education so that our students may have the resources needed to grow into responsible, safe, and healthy adults.

If your local schools do teach sex education but teach abstinence as the only or most important form of contraception, call your state representative.

Together as a united nation, we can guarantee our children’s well-being through our own preventative measures like making sure their education is informative and factual. We have a responsibility to protect our youth from becoming statistics, and a responsibility to keep our nation healthy.

While we may think that abstinence-only education is protecting our children, we may need to switch tactics in order to effectively save them from life-threatening infections and diseases. Countless studies show that abstinence-only education leaves our nation’s children vulnerable to more sexually-transmitted diseases and unplanned pregnancies. It is time to step up to congress to stop the funding of detrimental education like this one.

References

Bass, Brittany. "The Effect of State Mandated Sex Education on Teenage." ESSPRI Working Paper Series (2016).

Bell, Taylor. How Europe Proves That U.S. Sex Education Sucks. 2016. <https://archive.attn.com/stories/7020/sex-education-europe-compared-to-united-states>.

de Melker, Saskia. The case for starting sex education in kindergarten. 2015. <https://www.pbs.org/newshour/health/spring-fever>.